Reading Challenge 2015

Since Scott's classes are on Thursday nights this semester, I am predicting that most of my blog posts happen on Wednesday or Friday...don't judge and just be happy that I'm posting.

I found this Reading Challenge on pinterest a few months ago, and I am so excited to use it to guide my reading for 2015! That means I need to work in a little more reading time into my day, so if you have any suggestions on how to do that with two over-active little ones, please share!

I often get requests for reading suggestions, so I thought that a good way to start off this year's "Rinda's Reads" posts would be to list books that would fit with this reading challenge from ones that I've already read. The ones in italics are ones that I haven't read but I plan on reading this year, the ones in bold are books that I've read. My goal is to read new books to fulfill the challenge, but perhaps you are looking for suggestions on where to start with your reading this year. Well, here you go!

2015 Reading Challenge: Suggestions

• A book with more than 500 pages: Pick a Harry Potter, any Harry Potter by J.K. Rowling
• A classic romance: Persuasion by Jane Austen
• A book that became a movie: The Book Thief by Markus Zusack
• A book published this year: The Heir by Kiera Cass (if you haven't read the rest of her "Selection" series, I really enjoyed them! This newest installment is coming in May)
• A book with a number in the title: Counting by 7s by Holly Goldberg Sloan
• A book written by someone under 30: The Diary of Anne Frank
• A book with nonhuman characters: The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis
• A funny book: The Honest Toddler's Guide To Parenting by Bunmi Landitan
• A book by a female author: The Blue Castle by L.M. Montgomery (every woman should read this book)
• A mystery or thriller: The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie by Alan Bradley
• A book with a one-word title: Christy by Catherine Marshall
• A book of short stories: Winesburg, Ohio by Sherwood Anderson
• A book set in a different country: Mr. Pettigrew's Last Stand by Helen Simonson
• A nonfiction book: Here is Where by Andrew Carroll
• A popular author's first book: Edenbrooke by Julianne Donaldson (perhaps this author is popular only in Utah; nevertheless, I love this book!)
• A book from an author you love but haven't read yet: ANYTHING by Lynn Austen (if you haven't read her yet, you should!)
• A book a friend recommended: The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society by Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows
• A Pulitzer-Prize winning book: To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
• A book based on a true story: Twenty and Ten by Claire Hutch Bishop
• A book at the bottom of your to-read list: (this isn't at the bottom of my list, but it is one I love and couldn't fit anywhere else on the list) The Mysterious Benedict Society by Trenton Stewart
• A book your mom loves: Love is Eternal by Irving Stone
• A book that scares you: Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children by Ransom Riggs
• A book more than 100 years old: Herland by Charlotte Perkins Gilman (technically this book turns 100 this year, but I love it so much I just had to put it on the list)
• A book based entirely on its cover: A Song for Summer by Eva Ibbotson
• A book you were supposed to read in school but didn't: Warrior's Don't Cry by Melba Pattillo Beals
• A memoir: Alicia, My Story by Alicia Appleman Jurman
• A book you can finish in a day: Caddie Woodlawn by Carol Ryrie Brink
• A book with antonyms in the title: Big Sister, Little Sister by LeUyen Pham
• A book set somewhere you've always wanted to visit: The Silent Governess by Julie Klassen
• A book that came out the year you were born: Charly by Jack Weyland
• A book with bad reviews: Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte
• A trilogy: The Birthmarked Trilogy by Caragh O'Brien
• A book from your childhood: Ella Enchanted by Gail Carson Levine
• A book with a love triangle: Matched (series) by Allie Condie
• A book set in the future: The Giver by Lois Lowry
• A book set in high school: Scribbler of Dreams by Mary E. Pearson or The Secret Journal of Brett Colten by Kay Lynn Mangum
• A book with a color in the title: The Blue Sword by Robin McKinley
• A book that made you cry: The Help by Kathryn Stockett
• A book with magic: Enchanted by Alethea Kontis
• A graphic novel: I've never actually read one of these.
• A book by an author you've never read before:  Something by Charles Dickens (because I've never actually read a book by him!)
• A book you own but have never read: The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
• A book that takes place in your hometown: As far as I know, there is only one book set in Richmond, UT and it is a history of the town. Looks like I'll have to write one!
• A book that was originally written in a different language: Ruby Red (The Precious Stone Trilogy) by Kerstin Gier (translated by Anthea Bell)
• A book set during Christmas: Little Red Buckets by Lynda M. Nelson
• A book written by an author with your same initials: I'm still looking for this one!
• A play: Twelve Angry Men by Reginald Rose
• A banned book: Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury
• A book based on or turned into a TV show: Arthur by Marc Brown or The Little House Series by Laura Ingalls Wilder
• A book you started but never finished: Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte 

Comment below if you want any additional info on any of these books!

 Since the month is almost over (I started this post four weeks ago!), here's how I'm doing so far:

• A book with more than 500 pages:
• A classic romance:
• A book that became a movie: 
• A book published this year: 
• A book with a number in the title: 
• A book written by someone under 30:
• A book with nonhuman characters: 
• A funny book:
• A book by a female author: 
• A mystery or thriller: 
• A book with a one-word title: 
• A book of short stories:
• A book set in a different country: 
• A nonfiction book: 
• A popular author's first book: 
• A book from an author you love but haven't read yet: 
• A book a friend recommended: The Winter Witch by Paula Brackston (*** PG-13)
• A Pulitzer-Prize winning book: 
• A book based on a true story:
• A book at the bottom of your to-read list: 
• A book your mom loves: 
• A book that scares you: 
• A book more than 100 years old: 
• A book based entirely on its cover: Into the Whirlwind by Elizabeth Camden (**** PG)
• A book you were supposed to read in school but didn't:
• A memoir: 
• A book you can finish in a day: 
• A book with antonyms in the title: 
• A book set somewhere you've always wanted to visit: 
• A book that came out the year you were born:
• A book with bad reviews:
• A trilogy: 
• A book from your childhood:
• A book with a love triangle: 
• A book set in the future:
• A book set in high school: 
• A book with a color in the title: 
• A book that made you cry: 
• A book with magic: Wisdom's Kiss by Catherine G. Marshall (*** PG)
• A graphic novel: 
• A book by an author you've never read before: 
• A book you own but have never read:
• A book that takes place in your hometown: 
• A book that was originally written in a different language:
• A book set during Christmas: 
• A book written by an author with your same initials:
• A play:
• A banned book: 
• A book based on or turned into a TV show: 
• A book you started but never finished: 

I will update this list monthly, so come back for more ideas! The star ratings are based on a five-star system. The list includes 50 books, so if you want to join me you should plan on reading a book roughly every week. Happy reading!

Living Life Slow

I am trying my very best to keep up with this blog this year. As you can tell, I'm not doing so well. I've been working on last week's post for over a week (it's a list of reading recommendations, so be on the lookout for when I finally finish it). I'm so far behind on our family blog that I'm hoping we at least make it into the New Year by Valentine's Day.

I always thought that life would take on a slower pace when I was a stay-at-home mom with small children. We aren't even to the point of extracurriculars or preschool yet, but life seems busy. When I step back, I know it isn't, I just want it to be.

Scott is taking a class about human behavior for his MBA this semester. Last week they had an online discussion about the pro's and con's of the "Living Life Faster" trend going on right now, where employers are asking more and more of employees and in an effort to do more and be more, are we really accomplishing anything? A wise woman in his class pointed out that as employees devoted more time to their employers to move up corporate ladders faster, it was their homes and families suffering most. She thoroughly explained how, as the workforce demanded more and more, the employee's home life started to crumble. And when you look at it that way, our quest for success is really only hurting the next generation.

I often feel guilty for being a stay-at-home mom. I'm not sure why, when I know this is where Heavenly Father wants me to be, but there it is: I feel guilty. I feel like I could do more, be more. I feel like I have so much wasted potential. I could be changing the world, right? It is hard to not feel stuck changing diapers when I want to be superwoman.

Last Thursday Scott headed back to school. We are almost halfway through his MBA and it has been one of the hardest things I've ever done, but we both know the time is right and he needs to be there. I was having one of those days. I think I sent Scott the email with my bi-weekly Motherhood Resignation around 2:00 pm. Thank goodness he doesn't take those things seriously. The rest of the afternoon was difficult, as I was spending more time counting down the hours until the weekend hit and I wouldn't be on my own anymore.

That evening, I had gotten Sly to sleep for his pre-bedtime nap (he seems to think that he needs to sleep for 45 minutes around 7:00 pm and then be up until ten...but he sleeps through the night so we let him) and Kevin and I were playing in her room. Well, she was playing, and I was trying to figure out how to talk her into starting the bedtime routine of pajamas and brushed teeth and winding down.  She told me she had to put her baby to bed first and I consented wearily. She then proceeded to sing "Jingle Bells" to her baby doll, cradling the plastic body into her chest in a way that mothers do with their infants when they don't care if anybody is watching because the whole world only consists of them and their sweet-smelling, sleepy baby.

She then proceeded to pray with her doll. I mean, really pray. "Hen'ly Fader, Thanks day. Thanks our famiwy. Bwess [Sly]. Christ, amen."

It was the first time I'd ever heard her say a full prayer on her own, without help. And it meant even more because lately she refuses to pray, even with us helping her, and I haven't pressed the issue, just simply asked her to close her eyes and fold her arms while her Daddy or I pray. Those simple words simply melted me.

And then it came, the little reminder, the little whisper of the Holy Ghost: "You are doing something right. She is listening!"

Suddenly, the day didn't seem so long. The hours didn't seem so slow. The job didn't seem so miserable. I have all day everyday to teach my babies to pray. And they have all day to teach me to do and be a little better.

New Year, New You...No Thanks

I read a book to my daughter yesterday that disturbed me greatly. It was one of those "I can read it all by myself" Cat in the Hat labelled books (although, thank goodness, it wasn't written by Dr. Seuss) and she had picked it out at the library all by herself.

I should have known by the title.
Oh well.
Hopefully her childhood an emotional well-being isn't too terribly scarred (and we can all be grateful for the fact that she doesn't actually listen for more than two minutes when I read her books). Although perhaps it is not a good sign that I just bribed her with two chocolate kisses for the rights to borrow said book long enough to write this post.

This is how it went down yesterday.
"I Want to Be Somebody New!" by Robert Lopshire.

"Once I wanted to be in the zoo. 
And that was the day I first met you.
You said that the zoo was not for me.
The circus, you said, was where I should be.

At about this point, I realized once again that I read way too much into simple children's literature (see my controversial facebook post about Curious George that took place about a month ago). But already, two pages in, I was seeing literal evidence of a social media phenomenon that has taken over my facebook timeline and instagram feeds: #newyearnewyou and proclamations that if we all just lose 20 pounds we will feel better about ourselves.

And so the circus is where I went. 
I did my tricks with spots on a tent.
I put my spots way up in the air. 
I put my spots just everywhere!

Do you see where my mind went with this? If spots are our talents and perhaps our time, I started to view myself and others putting our focus on outward beauty, something that the faceless "society" has told us we must be and do: a stay-at-home mom must have a side business (most likely some pyramid scheme); a woman must have a passion that every spare moment is dedicated to (and it cannot be family or religion, that's just wrong); if you didn't sign up for a 5k, half-marathon, triathlon (or heck, a gym membership) this year, what the (bleep) is wrong with you?

My tricks with spots were lots of  fun. 
But no more spot tricks!
I am done!
Now I want to be somebody new.
So here's a  new trick I'll show to you!
   Ready! Get set now.
  One, two, three...
Now look and tell me what you see.

This just in...all of those things, if they are something that you feel compelled to do by some outside force and not a real, inner desire, will cease be fun and at some point they will not be enough. You will have to go further, work harder, and spend more time, all for the sake of becoming someone new.

When will just being you be enough?
Surely, I thought, that was where this book was going. The character had to find out he was okay being just the creature he was, right?
And, it did, eventually, but this is what I had to wade through to get there...

But being that big cannot be fun. 
Say! You must weigh at least a ton!
...You're very big.
You're very fat.
We do not care for you like that.

...But  being that tall can't be any fun.
You're taller now than everyone!
Your head is now so high in the air,
it's hard to see your face up there.
...We do not like to see you tall.
We do not like you tall at all!

...You are as small as small can be.

Well, what do you think? 
I'm asking you.
Do I look good this way to you?

We did not like you fat or tall.
And now you know what's wrong with small!

Okay! Okay! Okay, you two.
I'll make myself be someone new.
Ready? Get set now,
One, two three...

Now look and tell me what you see!

Oh no you don't! 
You stop right there!
We like you and we really care. (Insert sarcastic snort here from me)

We liked you best, a whole whole lot,
when you were just our old friend Spot.

Say! You are right!
As right can be!
And it does feel best to be just me!

FINALLY, I say. FINALLY.

Why does this get to me so much, you wonder? Surely this is no big deal. And why does this book immediately remind me of body image?

Well, perhaps it is this January Resolution time of year. Perhaps it is the post-Holiday treat guilt trip you find on billboards and commercials and junk mail and every outside source that tells you there is no other way to be a "new you" without losing ten to twenty pounds.

Here's the thing. I did that.
Not--and let me make this very clear--not on purpose.

Almost five months ago, I gave birth to a nine-pound baby. I now weigh 55 pounds less than I did the night before I had him. That's more than just getting rid of the pregnancy weight in celebrity speed. I now weigh 30 pounds less than my pre-pregnancy weight, all thanks to a medication that keeps me alive.

And, you can hate me if you want for saying this, I didn't put one ounce of effort into doing that. I ate every darn cookie and carbohydrate and French fry I wanted (I'd spent the previous eight months on an extremely strict diet). And, unless you count running up and down stairs fetching clean diapers and burp rags and running after a two-year-old all day, I did nothing in the form of dedicated exercise. No marathon training or yoga routine here.

So it might make sense to you why every time someone compliments me on my weight loss, I feel a bit like quoting Taylor Swift: "Fakers gonna fake fake fake."

I have extremely conflicted emotions about all of this (catching on to that now, are you?). While I appreciate that people care about me to notice, there is some part of me that hurts with each compliment.

"You are looking so good these days!"
Did I not look good before I lost thirty pounds?

"You get more beautiful each time I see you!"
Was I not a beautiful person before I lost thirty pounds?

"You are so skinny!"
Are you saying I was fat at what I thought was my ideal weight (twenty pounds ago)?

Actual quotes from actual people. Actual thoughts from actual me.
Please do not be offended if you have said something like the above quotes to me. I am truly not offended, and it is truly the sweetest and most cherished people in my life that have said these things. I just feel that it is important for me to set the record straight.

It might seem crazy to you, but I don't feel like a new person (isn't that what all the ads promise? New year, new goal, new weight, new numbers, new person?). Aside from the weirdness of putting on size six skinny jeans, I still feel like the same me. When I look in the mirror, I see the same person. In fact, I don't really notice a difference around my middle (where the most weight has disappeared), but rather on my feet and ankles and wrists and fingers. Sometimes (gasp!) I even miss the weight I was before--I liked those clothes, and I loved being able to wear my wedding ring 24/7 without worrying about it falling off my finger.

I know, people change. We become new people daily (haven't I written about that before?). But at the heart of it all, there is a core to me that will always be the pure essence of Rinda. It is what lets you recognize me through the years and trials and education and experiences and a few extra helpings of cheese and ice cream.

I was very blessed to be raised by a family that didn't base their love for me off of the way I looked. I always knew my parents found me beautiful, and my siblings appreciated me for me (even when we teasingly called each other "40 Fat" and "Chubalub," weight did not define our love). Those traits have blessed me well in my marriage (did you know that my husband lost 85 pounds on his mission and I loved him long before he became a triathlon athlete?)

While sometimes I did feel out of place growing up as a tall, "solid, big-boned" girl, those thoughts and feelings always came from outside sources, never my Heavenly Father or my family. I learned over a decade ago that my beauty was not dependent on how I looked on the outside. I learned that if I worked hard to make my inside beautiful, the outside beauty would come.

That is what I hope people see when they see me.
Not my weight loss.
And maybe, perhaps if you are someone who has said something to me, that is what you meant to compliment. Because you know what? I am looking good these days because I am feeling good these days. I love being a mother again. I am no longer battling depression every hour of every day. My family has brought a new light and twinkle to my eyes. And, two and a half years after the job that destroyed my writing soul, I am coming up with new story ideas daily and I am gaining the confidence to start writing again.

So this is what I hope to teach my daughter and she grows older and taller,as she inevitably (which she reminds me on a daily basis) will "get big!"

Try new things, find new passions, work hard to be the person you want to become.
But don't let your body image, a number on a scale, or outside forces define who you are.

And, though it seems so Pinteresty-cliche, be-you-tiful.